Crawling In Love
Finding happiness in China
The crickets chirp day and night rejoicing that this summer heat is to their liking. After more than a week of torrential downpours resulting in flooding of the Yangtze, bright sunny days are here. Both types of days are wonderful. The rain brings a calming, grounding, and moody energy. And the sun brings a cheery, yet sluggish stillness type of energy. Today, it’s a clear blue sky and the sunlight brings out the most vibrant shades of green from the trees, shrubs, and grass. It’s a feast for my eyes.
I never would have imagined that I would come to love so many aspects of living in China. It’s still very hard for me to let it sink in but I have found so many things that my heart loves. I love living in a cozy apartment that is just the right size for me. I love the simplicity of having just about a week’s clothing that I cycle through week by week. I like the dryer but here in China, I love the mindful act of taking the time to hang up my laundry to dry. I also find so much comfort in secretly watching grandpa and grandma neighbors bring out their hand-washed laundry. I love hanging out with my cousins and chit-chatting with people I meet through my yoga and dance classes. I love seeing people from my community gather at the park tables fanning themselves while playing cards for hours and hours. I love that rain or shine, moms and dads take their kids around on a moped with no one complaining. Just accepting that this is life. I love that I’m a 5-10 minute walk to good tea shops and cafes, delicious restaurants, the gym, excellent shopping, a movie theater, you name it. I don’t get to experience and see any of this in the US.
Wuhan is unbearably hot, humid, crowded, and the traffic is terrible. It is nothing like the perfect place that I had envisioned with my reasoning mind that this is what I would come to love. Far from it. Yet quite unexpectedly, I’m crawling in love with being in China and with the people. My protective armour is melting little by little and starting to let some of the happiness be felt. Not all of it just yet and that’s because I’m afraid to fully feel it. Because I’m scared it will mean that I will live and settle down far away from my immediate family whom I love so much. I’m scared it will mean I have to get good at Chinese and learn how to navigate life out here, and it won’t be easy or comfortable. It’ll be challenging. It doesn’t make any sense to my brain why I would feel happy to be in such a situation.
Here’s a video of some of the things I love:
But here’s something that I’m truly understanding more and more. Happiness doesn’t come about when your reasoning mind convinces you that something is good. I’m discovering that true happiness is felt deeply in your body and heart even when it doesn’t make sense why it would be the case in your head. Soulful happiness happens when you are living in alignment with your heart. Doing so melts away all preconceived ideas of what brings you happiness that is coming from your ego. When you live life from your ego, you live from a place of fear that keeps you in a familiar spot even if it might not be great for you, whereas when you live from your heart and soul, you live from a place of faith in yourself and in the universe and thus, trust that you have and will continue to have everything you need in abundance.
If you have a feeling that there might be more to life than what you’re experiencing, you might be at the cusp of thinking something in you or your life may need to change. Deep down inside, you might already know what it is. You may have thought about it a lot already. But for true change to occur, you must also take action. Perhaps you need extra support and accountability from someone who’s got your back to help you navigate through resistance and fear with gentleness and compassion. I have 2 spaces available for 1-on-1 coaching. If you are interested in working with me as your coach, please reach out to me or complete my pre-coaching questionnaire, and will be in touch with you. It would be a privilege for me to witness you and your journey. My pre-coaching questionnaire: https://alaliwei.com/precoaching-questionnaire
Here are ways you can support me and my work:
I am a heart-centered coach who supports Asian millennials to deepen their relationship with themselves and gently free themselves from unhelpful expectations, patterns, and fears so that they can have the life and relationships they desire. Book a coaching series with me through my website: alaliwei.com
If you love this newsletter, get value out of it, and want to support the time and work that goes into these posts, consider donating to me by becoming a paying subscriber even if you don’t get anything extra. You’ll encourage me to continue what I’m doing!
Shop for stickers and prints of my artwork via RedBubble (@Liwei-Doodles). I get a cut of what you buy.
Follow me on Instagram @tidbitsfromliwei